"When I feel good about my body, my sexual attraction for that guy is not there." "Feeling my own sense of masculinity feels a lot better than sex with guys." "When I'm connected to myself and other guys, all my issues go away."
(Statements from actual clients)
What Does Real Change Mean?
Successful change can mean several different experiences for different men. Some men experience a natural reduction in their homosexual feelings and are satisfied with that. Some men experience dramatic reduction in their homosexual feelings and develop strong, emotionally intimate, non-sexual relationships with other men. Some men experience dramatic dissipation in homosexual feelings, bonded, affirming relationships with other men, then move on to attractions and love for women with whom they create loving marriages and families. In short, successful change is in the "eye of the beholder." Maximizing a man's heterosexual potential can and does occur with motivated clients because these men believe their homosexual feelings are not genetic and they were born for heterosexuality. By the way, did you know that eliminating shame for having homosexual feelings is one of the very first priorities of authentic Reintegrative Therapy?
Aversion techniques, behavioral-only changes, coercive attitudes, electroshock and the like are NOT a part of authentic Reintegrative Therapy. Truly effective therapy is profound work. Wounds can be healed. This can, in time, result in spontaneous and successful change.